new year's resolutions

today i am 59. i have completed 59 years, and go
waltzing into the 60th.
i don't have words to describe just how weird this is.
i never, ever expected to live this long. or wanted to.

be that as it may, things change. and so have i.

i decided that it is more fitting to give rather
than receive on my birthday. for all of you, infusions of light,
that awaken the highest and best in us all, on all levels,
that we may all prosper and grow, daily.
the local folks also get chocolate cupcakes!

this being a new year, i have some intentions.

as i refine my "seeing", i take lots of increasingly fine photos.
i get a better camera. (in the works as we speak.)
i tell the truth. to myself.
i travel to places that i haven't seen before.
i deepen my existing relationships, and create some new ones.
i write MUCH better poetry. (can't get much worse-no wait, i'm not rod mckuen bad yet.)
i learn to play the harmonica.
i continue to celebrate each day by asking, "what good comes my way today?"
and then i find it.
of course, i continue with yoga, as my guiding light.
maybe, just maybe, i'll do a dropback.
oh yes- i WILL rock and roll!

and then there's this:

i can say, i'm in much better shape than junior:

and some days are like this:

no matter. i'll take them all.

essence

the essence of life shall never be known by a human being
as long as that person seeks to observe life like viewer and object.
the absolutely essential nature of life can only be comprehended
by merging fully with the flow of life, so that one is utterly a part of it.
--365 tao, day 208

i don't know

a warrior accepts that we can never know what will happen to us next. we can try to control the uncontrollable by looking for security and predictability, always hoping to be comfortable and safe. but the truth is we can never avoid uncertainty. this not-knowing is part of the adventure.
it's also what makes us afraid.

--comfortable with uncertainty
pema chodron

unexpectant

meditate with no thought of gain.

expect no ambitions to be fulfilled;

only then will the inner force manifest.

--365 tao, day 202

prickly heat

sizzle

it's just too damn hot for words. at least,
my words.

want to go fishin'?

heart of darkness

heart of gold

in the interest of full disclosure, i love neil young.
i don't care how old, fat, or hairless he gets.
i think he's damn brilliant, and beyond sexy.
so, neil-call me.

exploding worlds

above all, be compassionate. this is a stand
against all evil, and it opens your spirit.
--365 tao, day 191

buddha was right

attachment causes suffering.

my camera broke.
i have to send it to texas for repair.
fortunately, it's still under warranty.

but, but...
it's going to be gone for a minimum of 2 weeks!
(nothing like being forcibly detached from yet another thing
from which i need to detach.)

also fortunately, i have been very graciously given a loaner camera.
of course, i don't know how to use it.
that i can rectify, since i've already downloaded the manual.

but, but...
ok, enough whining.

i've been vacillating about getting a better camera for a while now. guess this is my chance to make up my mind. there are just so damn many ways to go. doing the research has just confused me even more. pixels, sensor size, lenses, cost, memory cards, dust cleaning, video, batteries, battery life, etc, etc, etc. then there's all the stuff about which i am more or less totally ignorant, and likely to remain that way, lest my head explode.

so any suggestions or guidance would be greatly appreciated. please, chime in.
or just tell me what to do!

reach out and up

don't tell me
of the redhot longing
in bloodshot eyes,
looking skyward.
i don't care.
if you want the sky,
go there.

twisted

summer witness

summer blurs, blues

i know i'd feel much better on this beach.

summer suns

taking photos of sunflowers in black and white.
time to get out of town, i think.

no site is forever. if you find that the flow of energy has
gone elsewhere or that others begin to ruin an area, then
search for a new place of vitality. that is why those who follow
Tao seldom have fixed homes. they wander from site to site
so as to constantly remain in the stream of Tao.
--day 184, 365 tao

the eternal question, or at least one of them

where in the wave am i?




today is the 183rd day. it is exactly the middle day out of 365.
once you reach the center of anything, you can dominate the
whole in any way you please.
-365 tao, day 183

a very merry unbirthday

today is july 1. by the end of this month i'll be 59, assuming i live that long. so i'm taking the entire month as my mostly un-, then for real, birthday.

well, why not? who knows if i'll make it 'til 59? i don't.

so i decided to celebrate every day this month, just because it's another day.
i'm going to rollick, frolic and cavort, take photos of damn near everything, lose the censor in my head, laugh a lot. i'm going to explore new realms-geographic, emotional, physical, mental, spiritual. i'm going to act like i'm alive, and the world is mine for the asking.
sounds like fun, doesn't it?

"life is an emergency case! where is the emergency? is it a particular situation, one day of your life? no,every moment of every day is an emergency.
you have to do your best to face every moment, because this moment will never come again."
--each moment is the universe
-dainin katagiri

i invite you all to participate. it's your unbirthday, too, you know!

c'mon, it's just one month. we did poetry month, didn't we? well, kass did.

here's the plan.
for this month:
1. every day, say yes to something you would ordinarily decline. hell, say yes to everything! if you can't say yes right then, negotiate until you can.

2. at least once a day, do something in any creative sphere. that includes breathing. you are all multi-talented, just pick. take a photo, write a few words, build a card tower, sing, laugh, tell a joke, knit a doily, WHATEVER!

3. forgive everything. e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.

4. when you open your eyes in the morning, wonder what good is coming your way.

5. then find it.

are you getting the picture?

there's a buddhist saying: happiness is easy: want what you have, don't want what you don't have. so what if we choose to want that ache in the back, the age we are, the amount of money we have, the stories about our history we hold on to? what if we embrace all, ALL, that is our life? then what? what happens?


feel free to add to the list. post your experiences, or don't. play along, publicly or privately.

this is my unbirthday present to you.